Inner world v Outer World

We live in a strange world. There is a huge internal world that lies within us. We fight it everyday. We fight our innermost feelings to carry on and do what we want to even though sometimes that inner world is restricting us. How difficult it is to fight that inner world that is sometimes so different to the outer world that we live in.

What I also find so strange is the fact that most of us know this outer world much better than our inner self. My own reactions to things sometimes startles me. Oh! Why did I react in that way? I really don't know. I think our brain reacts faster than it understands thus these reactions can just be termed as impulses but even impulses are so weirdly different in every one. We can't understand our own impulses.

It is often said that there are soul mates. What is a soul mate? How do you know that you have found your soul mate? I feel a soul mate is a being with whom your inner world coincides or coexists in a way that makes both happy. The outer world remains constant for both and thus I feel it is rubbish.

I feel that the outer world is all make believe. It is what it is but it also is how you want to actually see it. But, the inner world within us is something that is, it is not how you want to see it or how you want it; it is just the way it is. You can't control something until you can't understand it and I feel most of us don't understand our inner world. Mastering your brain is the most difficult task faced by man. Brainwashing oneself is the most difficult thing that I have come across.

Also, the outer world is a clash. It is a clash of people with different inner worlds. We have different ideas, different beliefs, but all of us want to be accepted. Then, we choose to be politically correct until the inner worlds reach a point where the clash is imminent and the correctness then falls apart. It eventually might get resurrected but the clash happens and it happens everyday in every small way you can imagine.

I really want to understand the way my inner world works. What neuron ticks what reaction in me. If I can know that I can understand even other people better. Just imagine if you have mastered your own brain. You can bloody be Albert Einstein!